Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Peeing Outside The Box
Peeing Outside The Box
Back in 1973 I taught at a private school for emotionally disturbed adolescents, then of course there were the parent conferences. It’s always hard to tell which is the antecedent and which is the consequence.
I kept notes for absences in a folder. I never questioned them I just kept them. There was this long haired white boy named Bill who was absent a lot and so was the black kid who was fullback on the football team. His name was Alonzo Simmons and I was his coach. I just called him Mr. Simmons because he used to just wreck preppy white boys blocking for Cubby on the tailback blast
The last full day of school I took out all the notes and tabulated absences and excuses on the board. Bill’s notes were all the same. “Please excuse Bill he was ill.” Bill was ill 45 times and we all started to call him “Ill Bill.”
Alonzo was absent 32 times and his notes were all the same. ”Please scuse Lonzo he was getting his car spected.”
I got my truck “spected” this afternoon then I stopped at the Sussex County SPCA a behavior I’ve been doing no matter where I’ve lived for 30 years. And I always make a donation.
I noticed this one indoor cat in a cage and the card said,” A great indoor cat but when new puppy arrived he started peeing outside the box so the owner got rid of him.
The there was the young male beagle very relaxed and his card read, Cute and Cuddly but owner unable to house train.”
There was an eight month old lab’ shep mix with different colored eyes. He was kept in a cage for large cats because he kept jumping free of the four foot no ceiling smelly dog run community center
Other younger dogs saw me and pretended to be asleep because I’m an older human and they were afraid they’d outlive me and be returned or worse that I’d put a sweater on them and take them to the boardwalk.
I got home and took my five year old female lab to the bay. She was fetching a tennis ball when a weeble-wobbling elderly woman and her sweatered arthritic Chihuahua came up behind us. Jesse commenced to run 400 mile and hour circles around this little dog literally kicking sand in its face. I told the woman if I threw her dog in the bay that Jesse would retrieve it using a delicate soft bite
“Leave my dog the fuck alone, ”she said, surprising me.
I’m glad I only get me car “spected” once every two years.
Peace Freddog
www.davefredman.blogspot.com
Back in 1973 I taught at a private school for emotionally disturbed adolescents, then of course there were the parent conferences. It’s always hard to tell which is the antecedent and which is the consequence.
I kept notes for absences in a folder. I never questioned them I just kept them. There was this long haired white boy named Bill who was absent a lot and so was the black kid who was fullback on the football team. His name was Alonzo Simmons and I was his coach. I just called him Mr. Simmons because he used to just wreck preppy white boys blocking for Cubby on the tailback blast
The last full day of school I took out all the notes and tabulated absences and excuses on the board. Bill’s notes were all the same. “Please excuse Bill he was ill.” Bill was ill 45 times and we all started to call him “Ill Bill.”
Alonzo was absent 32 times and his notes were all the same. ”Please scuse Lonzo he was getting his car spected.”
I got my truck “spected” this afternoon then I stopped at the Sussex County SPCA a behavior I’ve been doing no matter where I’ve lived for 30 years. And I always make a donation.
I noticed this one indoor cat in a cage and the card said,” A great indoor cat but when new puppy arrived he started peeing outside the box so the owner got rid of him.
The there was the young male beagle very relaxed and his card read, Cute and Cuddly but owner unable to house train.”
There was an eight month old lab’ shep mix with different colored eyes. He was kept in a cage for large cats because he kept jumping free of the four foot no ceiling smelly dog run community center
Other younger dogs saw me and pretended to be asleep because I’m an older human and they were afraid they’d outlive me and be returned or worse that I’d put a sweater on them and take them to the boardwalk.
I got home and took my five year old female lab to the bay. She was fetching a tennis ball when a weeble-wobbling elderly woman and her sweatered arthritic Chihuahua came up behind us. Jesse commenced to run 400 mile and hour circles around this little dog literally kicking sand in its face. I told the woman if I threw her dog in the bay that Jesse would retrieve it using a delicate soft bite
“Leave my dog the fuck alone, ”she said, surprising me.
I’m glad I only get me car “spected” once every two years.
Peace Freddog
www.davefredman.blogspot.com
