Freddogg Off The Chain

A cul-de-sac of opulence where all roads from Tarpon to Wahoo led back to Black Marlin Drive where only white fish live had me trapped for a full 30 minutes on Sunday morning as I cruised in my Tundra listening to Lyle Lovett sing, ”I live in my own mind. Ain’t nothing but a good time.”

Wolfe Point is an upgrade to its adjacent neighbor Wolfe Runne because no matter how much money you are willing to mortgage someone else will eagerly dive deeper into debt to out shine your sorry ass. Then again others just have that much money and if not inherited then something illegal has to be going on-it’s the only way I can explain so many people having so much more disposable money than I do. I mean are they smarter, better networked, more adept at investing? Hell no, none of that can be true.

The first 15 minutes I was just amazed, wondering how big does a house have to be and how many ways are there to landscape a yard and manicure a lawn many of which looked like putting greens? The whole place looked like a development on the Philadelphia Mainline except there is no source of income to support development after development of million dollar houses in Eastern Sussex County Delaware so the question remains, ”Who are these people and are the drywall dust guys I see at WaWa each morning the hands on builders because local craftsman take two years to put down linoleum in a remodeled bathroom.

“ Goddam,” I thought. “Most of these people read my column in the 50 cent twice a week newspaper but who are they? I understand some have custom made bars in the basement along with several wall mounted plasma televisions and even a mini theater for the children to work on performances when they should told to shut up when NASCAR is on the three televisions so mommy can concentrate.

The last 15 minutes being a reverse snob too dumb to escape the inside to outside circle game I just became annoyed. It was just too much overkill. I wondered if I looked out of place and of course the answer was absolutely I was under surveillance with some napping security guard and former student sitting in an office sleeping off Saturday night.

I was glad to get back to the more simple confines of my 2600 square foot home with three full baths and four car garage, an office, Jacuzzi, multi decks, submerged landscape lights and paver brick walkways laid down by illegal alien master craftsmen.

I am basically a humble man with three cars for me and one for my wife. These other showoffs get on my nerves.

Peace Fredman