Freddogg Off The Chain

I am row house Philly meets the Delaware Shore guy but one thing I know just like Dylan, ”You don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows”. In Philly the wind blows and so does your mother. A Philly nursery rhyme, ”Hickory Dickory Dock The mouse blows!
In coastal Sussex County Delaware everyone thinks they’re a meteorologist. “It’s blowing on shore or off shore, light and variable, north west or northeast” and you know what that means, don’t you Fredman”?

“Yes, it means you don’t know what you’re talking about. Does it mean the wind is coming from the northwest or going to the northwest? Do hurricanes spin clockwise or counterclockwise and ask me if I care. And please tell me how it can rain its ass off? What ass, where?

My Philly Uncle Joe once said that it was raining cats and dogs and one of them bit him on the scrotum and wouldn’t let go. I was only 6 and didn’t need to hear that. I had this image of a wet cocker—what else- swinging like a wolverine between Joe’s wet legs as he sloshed in his rubbers towards the stoop on Hemburger Street.

Yesterday at the gym I told a guy about last summer and the bright red jelly fish inundating the green waters of Galway Bay.

“I thought Jelly fish didn’t like cold water, ”he said.
“That’s local coastal bullshit weather theory, ”I told him. “Jelly fish don’t have brains and preference packages. The wind blows as does the mouse,currents move and the Jelly Fish travel for the sole purpose of fucking somebody up.”

“I guess you’re right, I never thought about, ”he said. “What is a jelly fish anyway?”

“I don’t know, ”I said, but they blow!” “They sure do, ’he responded. “I fucking hate em!”

"Talk about the weather,what if the sky should fall? As long as we're together, it doesn't matter at all."

Jam up and Jelly Tight!
Freddogg