Freddogg Off The Chain

Male menopause and mid life crises did not exist until it was created by astute sociologists or was it created by mid life men and simply recognized by sociologists? Inquiring minds don’t give a dam!
Now there’s a new one-Manorexia- and it is as real as a short line at the deli counter. I have a basic way of handling recognizable weight fluctuations in other men which is not to comment one way or another.
I look at Al Gore and some of my Al Gorge friends and think ‘Go for it! Who cares? Way to be well adjusted! Bad food tastes the best and it doesn’t run any deeper than that.”
I have seen burly men go skeletal on the advice of cardiac and kidney doctors and suddenly they drop between 50 and 80 pounds and start to look old and craggy but it takes discipline to lose major weight and more discipline to stop losing it.
I was at a funeral in a bar-a new Lewes trend- and guys my age started to talk about diet. The guy sitting across from me was a Vietnam Vet, weighs about 100 pounds with an artificial leg, oxygen tank and deviated hose up his nostrils. And he was smoking a cigarette. And every time the free food tray came by he was on it like oil on an Italian sub.
“I’ve put on 20 pounds in the last 10 years and when I comb my hair and look in the mirror I look like Elvis Presley just before he died, ’one local colorful redneck said. “It’s the hair, ”I told him. "Too much, too wet and straight back is so Fifties!”
He then said he was a Type2 diabetic and I asked if he considered jogging or not drinking and he said,” The day that happens you’ll be sitting here at my funeral.”
“Bottom line is nobody wins.” Grandmom Rose said. We’re all born, we eat to sustain life,and we all die. What happens in the middle is just an empty hoagie.”

Bubba Freddogg