Freddogg Off The Chain

I was cruising north in the right lane early this morning one removed from the Bus lane because Super G was on my mind and I don’t mean Giant Slalom rather Genoa Salami.

My Tundra cab was quiet, alas too quiet- no radio and no IPOD on my head, although I am capable of wearing an IPOD and turning up the radio and answering my camera if there is a ringing in my ears.

They I saw a young Russian Couple crossing the highway from one outlet mall to the other. I was watching them and thought, “how incredibly dangerous not to mention Darwinian in a self eliminating herd thinning sort of way except she was fit and young and of value to the herd I’m no longer a part of, the victim of social vasectomy“

Anyway, the girl stepped right in front of a car and gets whacked ten goes into Olga Corbett and I believe the Spanish words are “El Smacko!”

I thought the bitch was dead no joke. I stopped and got out. The woman who hit her had a five year old on board. She was hysterical. She told me her husband was an emergency room physician back in Baltimore and how ironic was that? But she was emotionally distraught so I patted her shoulder and she hugged me like the hugging aunt from hell and there was traffic going by and I know too many people and I’m thinking “The story will spread that Fredman killed a young girl who by the way and thankfully was not dead or near dead simply shaking like the sister Kate I Don’t have and maybe a broken leg and a few ribs so it was all relatively good in terms of endings.

And that’s why you don’t drink and drive because a Russian girl may suddenly appear in your lane and you may hit her through no fault of your .08 ass but if she dies you may as well send Vladimir Putin your home address because the KGB is coming to spike your red bull with heavy metal thallium.

Life comes at you fast especially if your on foot crossing a highway.

FReddogg