Freddogg Off The Chain

Is a Chimp a person is the current argument running around Austria attracting the most interest since Julie Andrews sang “The Hills Are Alive” but everyone knows she was tripping?
I love the Great Apes which include Chimps, Gorillas, Orangutans and Gibbons. Apes have no tails and tell no tales out of school, in fact, they don’t go to school at all.
You can tell apes are relative to humans stupid just by looking at them. See the heavy brow region called the superciliary ridge and the slope of the front of the skull. That is natures ‘stupid’ sign no room for cerebral cortex and abstract thought. All that gymnastic stuff the apes can do is controlled by the back of the head.
Here are words of advice: Don’t prejudge actual humans by the shapes of their skulls because you will find it to be uncannily accurate because if we are related to Chimps in a kissing cousin sort of way those recessive genes will pop out like they did along a dead branch of human evolution introduced in my family by an Orangutan from Fish town Philly other known as Uncle Harry.
You know the only requirement for animals to be considered members of the same species is intra-fertility which in the case of the ape/human split is the result of very few field trials mainly because of the violence associated with foreplay.
If the animal rights people in Austria want a 26 year old male chimp named Matt to be declared a “legal person” than some tree hugger needs to hug Matt’s log and have his baby.
Here’s an addendum to this science abstract: The most intelligent of the Apes is the Orangutan but he won’t play at our stupid human tricks because his ass is by nature lazy. Orangutans remain my favorite animals on the planet.

Professor Freddogg