Freddogg Off The Chain

BOCHUM, Germany, Sept. 24 -- Acupuncture offers an effective alternative to conventional therapy for low-back pain, investigators here reported. However, sham acupuncture worked just as well as verum, or true, acupuncture, they reported.


Ask any drummer if you want to get a lazy assed passive and depressed crowd up and onto the dance floor just scream into the microphone “Uno! Dos! One! Two! Tres! Quatro!” And all the Wholly Bullies will come on up outta there. Sam The Sham is my dog "Little Red Riding Hood you sure are looking good.”

Sham acupuncture works as well as “verum true dat” acupuncture, in other words, “stick some needles into my lower back bitch and I’ll immediately begin to feel better about myself.”

I know now by way of revelation that I must open up an Office “Fredman Sham Psychiatrist.” I may not know what I’m talking about but no one else does either.

Patient Therapy One

‘Fredman I’m depressed.”

“I can see why. How long have you had that wart on the end of your nose?”

“That’s not what I’m depressed about?”

“Really? That would bug the shit out of me.”

‘My husband doesn’t find me attractive anymore.”

“And what does his tractor head look like?”

“He’s dumpy dough boy looking, drinks and chews tobacco.”

“Well then it can’t be a good feeling when he goes into rut every fall, now can it?”

Patient Two:

“Fredman do you think unrealistic goals and over inflated self image is pathological if the person is aware they are tripping? You know walking around in a waking fantasy word”?

‘No. not at all, most of our personal trip odometers are 50 percent of our total mileage.”

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t know, I’m Sham Psychiatrist, remember?”

And now for a limited time an online special. “Write to Fredman The Sham Psychiatrist online and like a battery free of charge I will post a therapeutic strategy to help you get well-or not.

"Hello Stranger! Here's my story it's said but true it's about a gal that I once knew."

"Did she take your love and run around with every single guy in town?"

"Yep! Yep! Humdey day de dah de dah dey Yep Yep"

"Better listen what I'm telling you- Stay away from "Run Around Psuedo."