Freddogg Off The Chain

What is up with straight men who dress as women then attend Halloween parties-drink white wine spritzers- and get so into character wearing red lipstick and pouting in “little ol me” vulnerability actually giving off pheromones because I’ve seen prissy men and nasty bulldog hairy men become interested in these transformed creatures of the night and I’m like ‘Star Wars Bar” is just a night and costume away.

One year in the early 90's I dressed as Yassir Arafat and I liked it because I’m closer to a Ringo looking dead terrorist than an attractive woman and I’m fine with that. The problem now is that with the war on “TUR” as Bush calls it anyone going to a party looking Kurdish will be gunned down by an irate citizen while pumping gas at the Super WaWa.

That’s it! WaWa worker. I could represent that with green hat, yellow tee shirt and my own hoagie nametag as long as it’s not a Shortie.

And you know if you follow Catholic Theology that the souls of the dearly departed are flying around all over the freaking place tonight because release me from the fires of purgatory and someone is going to pay because that shit ain’t right.

Any good mischief night stories or have all my adult friends repressed them all? Just remember if you do anything that involves knocking on doors and lying in wait with a garden hose and you only run 5.3 for the 40 yard dash your pumpkin is ripe for place kicking.

freddoggy