Freddogg Off The Chain

The Siamese cat always sleeps in the garage on top of the high definition converter box because he likes to know what time it is. Raven is an eight year old Boney James-Charles Manson-Navy Seal Point survivor. So when a fat-assed raccoon came from the woods and crawled into a bag of dry dog food Raven was like “not my problem I don’t eat that shit anyway.”

But Jesse and Darby, well that’s another story, actually a second story, in a tree top lover Bad Leroy Brown sort of way.

“Well the two men (animals) took to fightin And when they pulled them from the floor Leroy (Darby) looked like a jigsaw puzzle With a couple of pieces gone” Jim Croce

I had a dog Barkley who went face first into a raccoon fight and it cost me 180 dollars to have his face stitched up. Fortunately Jesse and Darby rAn in place until the raccoon had a good head start as he shimmed like my sister Kate on a Jelly plate up the tree growing through my deck deck.

Enter dumb human tricks as I laser locked in with speed flash and took a picture of Biggie Smalls of the Raccoon World realizing that if he perceived being 'lit up' as a threat he would simply drop onto my face and I would be pulverized beyond recognition other than dumb-assed human.

Walk out my door and it is, in fact, a jungle out there.


Freddoggy