Freddogg Off The Chain

Why do neighbors who don’t own dogs always put “two and pooh” together and deduce that your off the chain pets are defiling their bullshit properties.
These people need multiple layers of low strata families to cohabit in my house down the street. Let them run out to Lowe’s and purchase more motion activated security lighting.
I stopped in my truck to say hello to an elderly neighbor walking his Bichon Frise described by the AKC as “a small, sturdy, white powder puff of a dog whose merry temperament is evidenced by his plumed tail carried jauntily over the back.”I call it a gay bitch.
“Have you ever considered getting a dog, ”I joked to which the man said, ”Who’s there” so I stayed with the dyslexic theme and said “Knock Knock.”
The point is from two feet away he couldn’t focus my big head filling up a truck window but then said “My dogs were crapping in his yard” and four other neighbors have told me the same thing which is pathetic and I know it’s untrue and all I can say to them is “That’s all you got? That’s the weak game you are bringing? “
Then yesterday I saw a trash man taking a digital photo of strew trash and I know the neighbor who hasn’t spoken or waved to me in 10 years will summon up the courage to accuse Porka Choppa Jessie “your dog” of ripping his flimsy white tied with red bow garbage bags apart and I will respond “Get another trash can you cheap ass.”
Jesse and Darby are my last dogs because I don’t want to talk to neighbors about such matters anymore ever again. When we lived in town we had this cat that would walk from car to expensive car leaving paw prints and sometimes even sleep on the roof. It was all the way freaking hilarious.
"That's not my cat" was my defense and I had no problem going Judas on his selfish self because if he could talk he'd sell me out for a fish stick.
Peace